I woke up again in the middle of the night from a nightmare. My heart was pounding wildly, and I was covered in cold sweat. This dream had been haunting me for seven years. I knew I had committed an inhumane act, and I didn’t know how to atone for it.
Day after day, that winter day kept replaying in my dreams. In the dream, I was shouting again, feeling anger and frustration, roughly grabbing a girl by the hand, and throwing her out the door. And there, hands emerged from the darkness, reaching for her and pulling her into their possession. Only then did I realize what I had done.
Seven years ago, I was married to Lyudmila. She was a girl from my parents’ village who returned home after an unsuccessful first marriage, bringing her daughter, Sonya, with her. When our romance began, Sonya was eight. Initially, I accepted her child without much trouble, but when we started living together, the little girl began to irritate me. She was somewhat withdrawn, and a plain, unpleasant duckling with wheat-colored hair.
One day, when Lyuda went to visit her mother, I got fed up with Sonya and threw her out onto the street. It was December. An hour later, I cooled down and went out to bring her back, but she was gone. Her body was found three days later in the woods. She froze to death. I don’t know why she went into the forest. After that, Lyuda separated from me. She can’t stand the sight of me, and I can’t stand myself. Not a day has passed without my conscience tormenting me. All this time, I prayed to God for only one thing – to give me a chance to somehow atone for my sin.
One day, as I was returning home from work, another bitter December evening, I noticed a small figure barely dragging her feet on the side of the road. I stopped the car. It turned out to be a little girl. When I first saw her face, I almost cried; she resembled Sonya. “Get in the car; you’ll freeze,” I said. The girl looked at me with fear. ”
I won’t harm you; just get in.” She decided to trust me. It turned out she had left home because her alcoholic parents mistreated her. And then I understood that this was the chance I had long prayed for. I adopted Svitlana. We get along wonderfully. I know I can’t erase my guilt, but at least I want to lighten my burden. Nightmares won’t haunt me anymore.
