My husband and I have been living together for eight years, but we didn’t think about signing and kept postponing this matter. Initially, we dreamed of a wedding, but we didn’t have the money, then we moved in together and started our life. Realizing that marriage is optional and not so necessary for us, we decided not to spend money on it.
I had planned to stamp my passport when I got pregnant so that we would all have the same last name, but each of my pregnancies unfortunately ended in a miscarriage, and I didn’t know what to do. I am thirty-five years old, and my husband is three years older than me, so the chances of a successful pregnancy were becoming less and less likely. I lived through each of the three miscarriages for a long time; of course, my husband supported me, but I grew tired of traveling to hospitals, undergoing lengthy examinations, and waiting for some kind of miracle.
I always believed that my husband would be faithful to me until the end of our days, and I couldn’t fathom that he could betray me. But it happened, and I was completely shocked. About a year ago, a new cohabitant appeared in our house; she was in her thirties, and in my subjective opinion, she was very beautiful.
She lived below our apartment. And I wouldn’t have guessed that she was disrupting our family happiness with her husband if another neighbor hadn’t told me that this girl regularly let her husband into her apartment. When confronted, he claimed he was only helping her with repairs.
I had no reason to believe him, so I decided to monitor my husband and his potential mistress, and after some time, my fears were confirmed. I was completely confused and didn’t know what to do. Of course, I can break up with him and kick him out of the house, but I don’t want to be alone for the rest of my days. Recently, quite by chance, I met her face to face, and she started talking to me.

She said that everything is serious with your husband; we’ve been dating for six months, and I won’t lie to you. She said I was already too old and couldn’t give birth to a child and make my husband a happy father, and she is capable of doing that. I stood up and listened to her, and I couldn’t believe it was true. Barely holding back my tears, I ran home.
After this conversation, I spent the whole day thinking. But she is right, I can’t do anything for my husband. I can’t give birth to a baby, and all I’m doing now is interfering with his ability to be happy and find a complete family. On the other hand, I realized that I am like this, no one else would marry me, and letting go of my husband, I would find myself unloved. But do I need a loved one who doesn’t love me back?
Completely confused in my thoughts, I set myself up for a conversation with my husband for several days, or I wait for him to confess everything and leave. I have decided for myself that I won’t keep him, I will let him live without me.
It happened, and I can’t avoid it, but it still hurts me, yet in my heart, I hope that my husband will come to his senses and come back to me.
